gracious tempest

She wakes up to the gentle kisses of her husband, sleepily pressing himself against her. She feels his desire for her, and she gives in. Although there was not much to give in to, she wants him just as badly. They're hoping for baby number 2, and every day she feels grateful he never makes her feel any less sexy—stretch marks and all. There's something beautiful about their lovemaking, possibly because they know what they are now capable of making. Baby number 1 has affirmed what they always knew: they were born to be parents. She knew he would be a great father, but he's shown himself to be as close to perfect as possible. And the baby, she attributes all his characteristics to his father, but we all know he gets his loving, affectionate side from her. She finds it in herself somehow to be both gracious and beautiful as a mother. He falls in love with her more every day.

She turns on the shower and gives herself a quick rinse. She's greeted with her giggly baby and his shirtless father. She's in love. Life makes sense. The heartbreaks she's endured, years after years. The dragging through the mud and the pain from the changes that came with growth. She would have never shown up as the woman she is today if she wasn't both pushed and supported through the trials and tribulations. They stand in the restroom, and she speaks a prayer of thanks to God aloud. Tears fall from her eyes, and he knows not to ask if she's okay because he knows they're tears of joy. He repeats, "Amen!" and tells her she's the most beautiful woman he's ever set his eyes on. She believes him.

Once ready for the day, she takes a second to check her emails for anything urgent, then off she goes for her morning walk to get coffee. The dog is eager, and the baby is talkative. She elects no AirPods, because today she feels like hearing God's earth speak to her. A slight breeze hits her face, and she knows God is there. She whispers another prayer of gratitude. The days are long, and she's grateful they are. They're not perfect, but she's grateful they exist. The happiness she feels today is a mirror to the sadness she felt at one point not too long ago. She prays again that God continue to guide her steps in the right direction, that He continue to challenge her patience and grow her strength. She feels slightly nauseous and a quick sense of happiness hoping it's exactly what she thinks it is.